Meek Mill Won’t Be Mistaken For Mother Theresa Anytime Soon

Rich people are the best! I hope to be rich one day just so I can be so out of touch with reality that I think splitting $20 7 ways is an act of penance. Imagine if it wasn’t the holidays and Meek wasn’t feeling kind. Are we sure Meek isn’t everyone’s grandmother? I swear my grandmom never heard of inflation. She used to give us $20 at the movies between 4 of us to get snacks and drinks. She just never realized FDR wasn’t President anymore. She forced me to buy Sno-Caps. Sno-Caps are the John Middleton of candy. Poor, misleading, and you don’t have to throw stupid money around to get them.

Did you ever look at the candy display and wonder who the hell buy’s Sno-Caps? It was me and my cousins singlehandedly keeping the Sno-Caps line running because grandma was afraid we’d be carpet bombed by the Germans at any minute in 1999. I didn’t get my first taste of Cookie Dough bites…the GOAT movieplex candy…until I was 11 and could afford it myself due to hours of child labor cutting lawns. I don’t blame grandmom though because one box of Cookie Dough Bites, a cherry & blueberry mixed ICEE, and some popcorn cost the equivalent of 10 lawns. I was forced into child labor at an early age just so I didn’t have to eat candy that freshened my breath as it rotted my teeth. Has anything not lived up to it’s name more than Sno-Caps? Fantastic name and display, but the execution was awful. It was perfect for the 1980s when it was bought by Nestle and stocked in movie theatres worldwide as cocaine was rampant and taste buds took a back seat. But then America grew up and focused on the better stuff like pills and heroine (cookie dough bites & sour patch kids) and cocaine never re-branded.

But I love this move by Meek Mill. He could’ve given these kids $700, but what would that prove? They probably pack up their water stand at that point and blow their money on candy and the new 2k. Instead Meek Mill forced them to take their $2.85/ea and reinvest it back into more water.

“Give a man a fish and you feed him for a day; teach a man to fish and you feed him for a lifetime.”

The water hustle isn’t a game for the easily discouraged and Nestle actually owns a bunch of water brands. Now that they gotta make up for all the movie theatre candy revenue lost during the pandemic they can shower these kids in Sno-Caps. Funny how the world comes full circle.

Virgil Abloh scoffs at this Meek Mill donation.

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