— Johnny (@HomeMalone) June 9, 2020
How about the balls on this guy? And I don’t even mean he had a lot of balls for saying Dak won’t ever win a ring in front of Dallas Cowboys fans. Dallas Cowboys fans are like little Bichon Frise’s a lot of bark, no bite and when you make a move towards them they run away with their tale between their legs. I mean this kid has balls because he just hijacked this wedding with his Best Man’s speech and completely overtook the bride. This chick is going to claw this guy’s eyes out.
Rule 1: The bride, the bride, the bride. It’s the bride’s day, don’t take anything away from the bride or she’ll have you murdered. You think anyone was talking about the bride after this speech ? Fuck no. They were talking about Johnny. Honestly, the burn wasn’t even that good. The story? Good setup, good execution, but the delivery was like a 5/10 which is like touching your black leather seats after your car sat in the sun all day. Solid burn, but you’ll come back from it in an hour. But understanding the environment I’m sure he’s in that shit plays. I assume is vastly a white person wedding. You know there were dads coming up to Johnny and doing the fake shot to the rib cage move dads love. Every time a dad saw him for the rest of the night he shouted “There he is!” No one cared about what the bride looked like after that speech. Everyone wanted to talk to Johnny about where Dak ranks in his top-10 QBs in the NFL. Does he think he’s worth $40 million a year? They probably talked for the rest of the night about Dak vs. Wentz while the bride cried in the corner eating leftover chocolate strawberry’s from the desert bar they dropped $10k on.
There’s no chance she didn’t have Johnny killed. I don’t even think if you’re a judge you can convict the bride if she had him murdered. That’s just simple common sense that Johnny lacks and now he’s dead. Good riddance Johnny. Great speech, but you have the awareness of Dak Prescott, and ironically now you’re dead.