We Have Solved Ben Simmons’ 3 Pointer Problem With This Robotic Backboard


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If we can convince Adam Silver to implement this robotic backboard than Sixers fans finally can get back to being on one united front because Ben Simmons will never miss another jumper again. This kid was throwing shots through his leg, left handed, right handed, bank shots, everything. Not even Ben’s fragile psyche about looking dumb when shooting could be damaged with this backboard. The Sixers would rattle off seven straight championships. This is the best thing Artificial Intelligence has created since the Tesla. I feel like I have to thank baby X Æ A-12.

With the invention of this backboard, and the fact Ben has braids now, it might make sense to prepare Broad Street for a parade whenever the playoffs start. I’m going to need him to the master the wave cap though before we can call for total domination.




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