The two words may evoke fear and devastation in minds of others, but for the Raipur-based couple they symbolise triumph over hardships as the twins – a boy and a girl – were born during the ongoing coronavirus-enforced nationwide lockdown which has disrupted normal life.
The names, they said, would remind them about all the hardships they conquered amid the lockdown, ahead of a successful delivery on the intervening night of March 26-27 at a government hospital in Raipur.
Expecting parents, celebrities, and Instagram influencers don’t do this. It’s not the time. I understand it’s all about the clout. Parents are always trying to think outside the box when it comes to their kid’s names. How do you think we’ve gotten so many variations of Lindsey? Have you ever tried to spell a Lindsay’s name in front of her? Linzy’s are adamant you spell their name correctky. Sorry Lindsee I don’t know if your parents were hippies, white trash, or black. Your name has more variations than a game of Bop It. I can’t be held accountable.
Regardless Covid and Corona sound like some 1970s flower power group or an underground Indie band. Think 10 years down the road when your kids are asking how they got their names. Oh, well you were born during a pandemic that ended up taking out 5% of the world’s population before we found a cure. Remember how you never met grandma and grandpa?
Just name your fucking kid Ramesh or Srinivas (not racist I looked up the most common baby names in India, so fuck off) and call it a day. Listen, I’ll tell you what. I was shocked this happened in India. I was almost certain this happened at some bougie hospital like Mt. Sinai in LA or NY. You don’t think Kris Jenner is trademarking Kovid or Korona for the next spawn of Satan as we speak? But nope. Turns out they’re just as batshit looney with their children’s names in India too.
However, the couple said they may change their decision later and rename their kids.
Woah woah woah! You can’t just do a trial run with your kid’s names. You can’t press restart like you’re losing on All-Pro in Madden. This is do or die. You know how shitty it is to change a child’s birth certificate in America? Imagine what the process is like in third world India. You made this bed, now you must die in it. On Covid’s 19th birthday it’s going to be a celebration for the ages. He already has the birthday hashtag. #COVID19
And how about this quote?
“When the hospital staff also started calling the babies as Corona and Covid, we finally decided to name them after the pandemic,” she said.
So what would’ve happened if nurses and doctors started calling them “Dumb Fuck” and “Cock Sucker”? I probably would’ve still preferred that over Covid and Corona. Imagine their teachers taking attendance all throughout school. The teacher whose family members died from this virus has to be reminded everyday because the Gwyneth Paltrow of India wanted to get cute with her newborn’s names.
Covid and Corona have 0 shot succeeding in this world!
P.S. Was I supposed to know India had states? I know it’s huge but I just assumed Mumbai was a city.